There I Went Again

SO it happened. Again.

I recently had a manic episode.

It may be cyclical, seasonal, annual, whatever it is, it happened again and threw me for a loop. Again.

What most people (myself included)  may not realize about mental illness, is that you really have no control over it.

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I got happy. Too happy, again.

I was on an a healthy exercise kick, again.

I got too grandiose with my thoughts, again.

And it stinks too, because once again, life was feeling good. I was feeling happy and off to a great start in a new year.

But I went too far and started sleeping less which led to full blown mania.

I was not as hysterical to as many people as last time. But my thoughts were delusional.

I was receiving a message from God that doesnt sit right with this world.

SO I had to go on medicine to bring me back down.

So here I am. Feeling down.

Which depression is expected as you recover from mania.

And I am meeting with my psychiatrist to try a new medicine because of potentially bad side effects.

I dont feel as low as last year. Yet.

And heres to hoping I wont have to feel that low.

I am optimistic that each and every episode from here on will be a learning curve with less and less negative side effects.

As many people who deal with any form of mental illness, learn.

Just know that there is no shame.

No matter what you are going through, there is a betterness in sight.

And if you have a loved one struggling with mental illness, try to be patient and be and  remain a positive influence for them.

If I didnt have such an amazing husband who is so patient yet pushy-when-he-needs-to-be, I dont know where I would be.

But I know it would be a lot worse than it could ever be. Because of him, and his love for me.

SO continue to be supportive of others.

Even strangers. Be kind. We have no idea what they are going through and what kind of/or lack of support they have.

Not all battle scars are easily recognized. Find the beauty in each other.

Be blessings to each other in this world.

Let. Love. Win.

Comments

  1. Valerie says:

    Praying for you and with you Kimmie.

    Thanking God for you and your beautiful self!

  2. Thank you so much Valerie <3

  3. Valerie says:

    You’re welcome

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